My furboy (who has his first birthday next week) is constantly barking at the woodpigeons who are regular visitors to our garden. Indeed, there is a nest in our wisteria which I think they are sussing out for this year’s brood. Nothing energises my furboy more than launching himself out of the patio doors in the direction of any fence which bears a woodpigeon and barking, barking, barking (amazingly my neighbours are very tolerant).
The other week, he took his favourite blue ball outside to play. When he came back indoors, he left it on the lawn. He is not good at bringing his toys back in again and, as it was snowing, I decided I would wait and collect the ball later in the afternoon before it got dark.
Then the ball went missing. My husband and I went out to look for it, and it had literally vanished. Mystifying.
Furboy has missed his blue ball, but we have managed to keep him occupied with his yellow and green squeaky toy balls instead. Then, today, I happened to look up at one of my neighbour’s gutters and saw…….. the blue ball! It looks like one of the birds (probably a woodpigeon as we have so many of them) has swooped into the garden, taken the ball, and dropped in in the gutter of our neighbour’s house, out of furboy’s reach. I reckon it is revenge on furboy for all the barking he does at them – even though the birds just sit and look at him (they probably think “what a stupid dog!”). These neighbours have not long moved in and we haven’t met them yet, so I feel I can’t go and ask them to get it for me.
So, I think blue ball is a loss. We may have to get him a new one for his birthday.
I’m still suffering from Covid, so today’s blog is a little more light-hearted. I’m Day 2 now – apparently in three days time I can go outside again.
I’m sure every single person has words or phrases that they absolutely hate/loathe/despise. According to Jessica Kaplan, in an item published in January 2023, there is a new list for 2023 of words that should be banished to the Room 101 of words, some of which I use a lot (I mean, what’s wrong with ‘amazing’? And I’m often asking my tutees if something I have explained to them ‘makes sense’). In contrast, some of the words/phrases on the list I have never heard of before (I thought ‘goat’ was literally the animal and had no idea that it was a complimentary acronym. This Gen Xer can’t get with today’s lingo).
I thought I would compile my own Top 10 list of words and phrases which I cannot abide. Admittedly, some are modern lingo but the phrases I have picked just set my teeth on edge.
‘Muggy’: how on earth is stuffy, humid weather like a mug? The word even sounds clumsy.
‘the [something] experience’: urrrghhh. This annoys me so much, especially when used as ‘the student experience’. It’s one of my pet hates. Just call it ‘student life’. I have done several degrees and have only ever thought of them as ‘experiences’ in a negative sense. Like experiencing an all-nighter to reach a deadline and suffering the next day. Not something I would like to repeat.
‘Like’, like in a sentence filler/emphasiser. ‘Like’: This needs no explanation.
‘tuck in’ [as in eating]: You don’t tuck your food anywhere so this is a useless phrase.
‘lowkey [something]’: low key? Loki? Eh? What key?
‘unprecedented’: this seems to have been used in overdrive over the past three years and now I’ve grown fed up with it.
‘Nom, nom’: when did ‘yum yum’ get shifted for this weird noise?
‘Mucus’: just because it sounds as gross as it is. Partner this with ‘sputum’ for double the effect. Or phlegm for the treble. Ugh. Having worked in nursing, I get the whole graphic effect when I hear these words.
Vulgarities [any]/swearing/blaspheming: just because I don’t swear and think that the words people use for swear words sound so horrible and aggressive. Also, I find blaspheming distasteful and disrespectful. And, sadly, these types of words appear several times on every page of most modern books and on TV dramas. That’s why I prefer the oldies!
No doubt there will be a new list of June’s most hated words and phrases next year.
If you have followed me on social media over the past few years you will know that back in 2019 I decided to make a New Year’s Resolution to learn a new language. Despite having studied French at school to Higher level, my lack of ‘multi-lingualness’ was woefully shameful. So, I uploaded the Duolingo app onto my phone and made a point of making a serious stab at learning German – a language I had done in S2 at school and absolutely aced in the end of year exam (I still can’t work out why I dropped it for Standard Grade).
Four years later, I’m still plugging on with German (arguably, I did finish the German course but then Duolingo updated their app and added millions of new levels) but have also added Norwegian (could be useful for a holiday sometime), Swedish (same reason), Scottish Gaelic (well, they do speak it up north and it might be good to know), and Russian (just because the letters are weird and I thought it would look impressive). Yes, I do get German, Norwegian, Swedish, and Gaelic mixed up at times, but on the whole I’m getting there. At least German, Norwegian, and Swedish sound like they look when written down. Unlike Gaelic. And I have no clue with Russian – I’ve kind of given that up over the past year.
Anyone who has learned a language on Duolingo know that often they ask you to translate phrases which you just know you will never, ever, ever need; or at least you hope you won’t ever need. I have compiled the best 15 of these which I have screenshotted over the past year. There will be a further few posts in the future featuring any more. A new series – Duolingo Duds, perhaps?
First up: a recent occurrence in my Gaelic course. I shudder to think when I would be likely to use this…..
Ready for number 2? OK here it is. It’s much in the same vein, but I mean, really? I have to say that the Gaelic course does focus a lot on underpants, haggis, Irn Bru, and herring.
Third, we have this little gem from the spattering of Russian I did. I mean, this could be useful but I’m not going to go to Russia any time soon. Probably never. But hey. Don’t even ask me how this is pronounced.
Number 4 now. This is my Norwegian existential crisis. This will actually be useful to use even if it is said under my breath to myself when I am a little exasperated with my thesis chapter-writing.
Number five, from my German course. Admittedly, if I were a vegetable I wouldn’t like vegetarians either. A bit like turkeys not liking human beings at Christmas-time. There is only one outcome and it isn’t pretty.
Number 6. I mean, this happens all the time. Cats giving women skirts (shakes head)……
Seventh – I have to admit I have actually said this either when my interlocuter thinks I’m being a bit slow on the uptake or I’ve had so little sleep that I can barely lift it off my desk.
Number 8 – halfway. I need to have a chat with my Guardian Angel and ask him/her this question sometime. Otherwise, this phrase is kinda pointless really……..
Number 9. I cannot comment on this. She always appears sober when she is dealing with me. I’m usually the one in want of the alcohol when I know I have to visit her…..
Tenth up now. Breaking back to Norwegian from German. I have only seen this happen once, in Greece. I don’t know if this is also a custom in Norway so until I go and see for myself, this phrase will remain in Redundant Phrase Room 101…….
Nearly there. Number 11 in my really un-useful countdown is this one. This one doesn’t even need a comment……
Number 12: I don’t know about German universities but I doubt the presence of sheep would affect my decision to study at one. Unless they pulled the wool over my eyes or fleeced me for cash. I haven’t herd of that happening there though. Maybe she was mutton dressed up as lamb?
Number 13, unlucky for some. Unlucky for the person whomever I end up saying this to………
Number 14 now, penultimate un-useful phrase. Admittedly, and perhaps coincidentally, this came up during a week where there was a lot of global news about the climate crisis. But…… I hope I don’t have to use this.
And finally, the last one. Or ones. You get a double whammy for the last one. The first translation is so simple that I think Duolingo is having a laugh. As for the second one…… well, the mind boggles. Suffice to say, I’m very unlikely to use that little gem.
So, there are my first 15 Duolingo Duds. Don’t get me wrong, I love Duolingo and learning my languages – I’m on a 1107 day streak – but the odd weird translation is a little entertaining. Once I have collated some more, I will post them in a future blog. I’d be interested to know if anyone who is reading this (is there anyone?) also uses Duolingo and has equally as…..inappropriate….. translations.
June's Jottings 